A Rough Couple of Days

In a sunny mood today

even if it is cold

Tuesday evening I started getting ill. I was up all night in and out

of the bathroom..till about 5 AM . Then I slept and laid in bed all day.

Felt like I'd NEVER eat again..UGH.

Last night I had a wicked headache..but slept good and woke up refreshed.

I am planning on going to the movie "The Lovely Bones" today with a

friend. We both read the book a few years ago. If you haven't read it, I

recommend it.

So glad I feel better. My ribs hurt from throwing up so much.

Remember all those in need of prayer .

There are MANY!!

Let me know how you are doing.

fondly

Prayers Please

My little deer friend, she looked when I opened the porch door.

I know I've been silent for a bit.  After I finished the Whole Brain Radiation, things just got

icky. I was so scattered for so long, and then IT set in. The nausea, the not being able to eat. The NOT SO GOOD attitude.  The sleeping all day and night.  

Here it is two months later and I'm not better. 

I've lost 20 lbs since November, I go out for dr appts and that's it. Rich did all the Christmas shopping that got done .. ALL OF IT.  

I did go to the docs and go again next week. I had another Brain MRI last week and it showed NO new tumors and the ones that are there are smaller.  Great news!!

We are trying to get the nausea under control. It is much better, but food..YUCK..I don't like anything.  I do eat something each day..but I can't eat much.   

The worst part, I am NOT all happy ..not mad or angry..just feel like I've lost my lust for life.  My dear hubby has been so good about it.  He lets me do what I want, doesn't push, except to make me eat.  

I am not trying to starve myself..I want to eat. 

SO..I am asking for prayers for ME..That this will get better..I can't keep losing weight..and that

my joyous attitude will return.  I want to be positive like I was before. 

I don't talk on the phone ..cuz I just have not much to say..I  WISH I knew someone like ME..who has gone through all of this and could share with me ..but alas..I know

no one....If you know of someone who has stage 4 breast cancer, with brain mets ..and radiation

would you ask them if they'd share their experience??

I'm crying now..maybe this post did ME some good.

Love to you all

Deena

Trust the Journey

Not to worry my dear friends. ..I am here and well

I have only 5 radiation treatments left

so next Tuesday will be my LAST !!

After that..just watching and testing me

(every two months for the brain, every three

months for the heart and every three weeks for 

blood tests)

and the continuing Herceptin & Zometa

every three weeks.

I lost my spirit for a bit, too tired to do anything

or even care about doing stuff. I realized then, I just 

have to trust my journey.

I have gotten some sweet gifts the past 2 weeks also

bringing me much joy. My friend Sally ..made a "Little Book of Joys"

as I was finding it hard to find some.  I don't know why..I am not

depressed ..just tired.  This too has passed.

I have a list of things to help  a friend through her journey

Call to chat

Stop by to do laundry

Take her a milk shake

Cook a meal for her & the family

Get manicures & pedicures together

Wash her car

Add her to prayer chains

Ice cream sundaes are always fun

Shampoo her hair

 Please Share your joys with me

& art you've been working on

He's Here!!

I saw him yesterday for the first time this season

isn't he lovely

My Prayer
Keep me from getting talkative, And particularly from the fatal habit of thinking That I must say something on every subject and on every occasion. Release me from the craving to straighten out everyones affairs.Keep my mind from the recital of endless details: Give me wings to get to the point. Seal my lips when inclined to tell of my aches and pains.They are increasing with the years And my love of reciting them grows sweeter as the years go by. Teach me the glorious lesson That occasionally it is possible that I may be mistaken. Keep me reasonably sweet. I do not want to be a Saint; Some of them are hard to live with, But a sour old woman is one of the crowning works of the Devil. Help me to extract all possible fun out of life. There are so many funny things around us, And I do not want to miss any of them. Make me thoughtful but not moody, Helpful but not bossy with my vast store of wisdom, It seems a pity not to use it all, But thou my Lord knoweth That I want a few friends left at the end.

Amen.

Author Unknown

from Joy at Books and Life

PLEASE pray for my friend Sandra Dias

as she begins chemo tomorrow..4/28/2008

Glory to God

Tis a very COLD day here. Woke of to zero, and crunchy snow.

I feel amazingly good, slept good, no sickness , still have hair!!

Oh what a Sunday.  

I'll be doing a few domestic things as my strength allows &

napping for sure.

Friday night Rich and I watched "3 10 to Yuma" with

Russell Crow, a remake of a 1957 western with Glenn Ford.

I enjoyed it, and there was always that glimmer of

hope for good in Ben Wade, Crowe's character.

Rich brother, Gary is coming to visit next Saturday...may not be good

for me, but I am hoping the boys will decided what to do with

their  dad long term.  

He's doing QUITE well at 

his apartment at Independence Village, but he can

stay in that apartment for 4 months, then he'll need to

make a long term commitment.

I need to get working a bit

and talk Rich into making breakfast, cinammon rolls and boiled eggs, with some milk for me ..and water , water, water..

Enjoy the day the Lord has made!!

lovingly

Deena & her friend, Mr Sanders

THANK YOU & Pray for Rich , my family & me tomorrow

I love this award..a burning pink candle

Angie from Quilly Sillys Vintage Paper Boutique

bestowed this on me. What perfect timing for me .

(She just lost her lil furry baby too..OH I know the hurt of that loss.)

I began my Dexamethasone today, a booster for

me during chemo,

ordered a cool wig today, had lunch with

my oldest daughter and came home to REST.

Last evening my youngest daughter , Mercedes called to 

see if I'd go to 

Sweeney Todd with her. .

I  was out of here and at the movie with 30 minutes.

It was great to spend time with her, hug her and just sit next to her.

Oh the movie..I liked it  a Bloody Murder Musical..but a cautionary

tale.

Tomorrow will be a long day for Rich & me.  Be at the Oncology Center at 9:30 AM

..blood tests for me, meet with the oncologist, discuss the Pet/CT scan

then 5.5 hours of chemo & Herceptin IVs.

I'll let you know the outcome as soon as I can.

  I expect the best news

but ..I'm prepared for anything..God is holding me in His palm.

lovingly, deena

OOPS ..just found out Sweet Mary of Mary's Writing Nook

left this award for me!!

Mary is a great friend..who I found here on Blog Land

God gives us what we need