Friday, January 25, 2008

Here's the Skinny !!


Rich and I before makeup!!
(NO Rich did NOT put on makeup too)




Getting pretty..well trying hard
isn't my hair cute..?? Nicole is awesome with the 
scissors.!!

Coming down to go.

We're there!!

Enter here

A great center..about 20 minutes from home
and this is what we learned.


The chemo "pod" has WiFi
AWESOME..


I couldn't play chemo..as my white blood count is too high
somewhere there is an infection..so antibiotics
this week and back NeXT Friday..2/1 at 8:15 AM for
blood work and try it again.


The cancer is in stage 4..in more lymphs thru my body
my adrenal glands, another 1 cm node to the left of my aorta, 
in my 9th rib..rib is breaking down..in my spine and 
numerous areas of my skeleton (bones)


Well I just lost it!! Rich looks sad and scared..but
as I read before..and my BFF Marcia reminded me 
today.


This is my BFF!!! Marcia
she is so awesome!!



EVERY CANCER IN EVERY STAGE has been survived..and 
I intend to fight the fight..
God's will be done..




Tis me home from the day's journey!!
I 'm smiling

thank you for being my angel wings

deena

94 comments:

  1. Oh Deena, oh sh**, oh my... You are so BRAVE !!! Thank goodness Rich was there for you. I would have lost it too. You are so sweet, Deena. Such a nice person. YOU WILL SURVIVE THIS. You just have to. Too many people would miss you otherwise and be devastated...My heart goes out to you. *hugs, hugs and more hugs and every wish for every angel in the universe to come to your aid and heal every bit of it inside you* YOU WILL SURVIVE...
    Love,
    Loving Annie

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  2. well, Deena, My sweet friend...
    looks like we've got our work cut out for us...
    time to get really serious about our prayers... we must be specific about the treatments of the day... so keep us posted as to which treatment you are going to have each time...
    right now I am concentrating on the infection...I pray that God will clear it up so you can start yur Chemo
    Please do not be afraid...God Knows the Outcome!

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  3. You look beautiful with or without makeup.
    Just wanted to stop by and say "hello" and let you know that I'm thinking of you and praying for you.

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  4. Deena,
    You look beautiful and happy. I think more important is the beauty that so very obviously shines from within.
    Praying for you! Stay very strong.
    xo

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  5. Good Evening Deena,
    Oh sweetie, I'm sorry there is an infection and you will have to wait till next Friday. Praying that the infection will be cleared up and you can start the chemo. You had every right to lose it. I would have lost it way before this. Maybe you and Rich can sit and hold each other and just lose it together. That might help both of you to feel better. Just know dear, you and Rich both are in my thoughts and prayers each and every day. You will get thru this Deena. YOU WILL BE A SURVIVOR!!!! There will be ANGELS all around you thru this and watching over you. Just trust GOD to do HIS WILL. Take care my friend and have a great evening. You look so beautiful coming down the steps. I would have thought that Rich might have put on a little make-up for us. LOL. Just kidding there. May God Bless You and Yours.

    Love & Hugs,
    Karen H.

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  6. Deena.... I am joyful that you are so strong (and such a pretty lady!)..... I wish there was more I could do for you.... but I will keep praying. My hugs and smiles to you!!!

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  7. Deena,

    It's time to pull out all stops, my friend. I'm recruiting the prayer warriors that I know both online and in the real world. I do know some great ladies who are powerful prayer warriors.

    You are beautiful and the light of the Lord shines through you. I will pray that the antibiotics clear up your infection and that all the other procedures go smoothly.

    Love you, my dear friend. I wish I lived closer so I could be there for you as you continue your journey.

    Blessings,
    Mary

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  8. Deena, I'm with the others! I'm calling out the troops for you! Every prayer warrior that I know will be praying for you, gal! The Lord knows about it all, has a wonderful plan for you, and when all is said and done, none of us will be the same ever again. We will have watched God do mighty things in and through your life, and that in and of itself will change so many! Thank you for letting us be a part of your journey. You KNOW you have my prayers tonight --- and EVERY SINGLE day until this thing is over! Cora

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  9. I love the photos Deena...of you and Hubby....I am praying for now more than ever.
    Love,
    Robin

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  10. I just found your blog last night and stayed up and read it all. You've become my dear friend over night.

    My dad has survived advanced prostate cancer for 4 years after being given the very grim news and a 6 month at best odds of survival. He got 2nd and 3rd opinions and traveled out of state to see a specialist. While doing everything he could medically, his faith deepened, he learned to meditate and listened to healing/spiritual music while getting his chemo, and changed his diet 100% - avoiding certain foods that might "feed" the cancer.

    Stay positive, hugs.

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  11. Deena, since you wrote earlier, I can not do anything much today, but pray for you. One thing that I did when I was so scared, I turned on some music and danced with Jesus. I remember just crying my eyes out, giving him my cancer and circumstances, and just danced away. I was alone and I have to say, I wasn't, and to this day, that was thee most special day of my life.

    So go dance with Jesus my friend, and let him embrace you tighter than you ever knew he could.

    I love you so much.
    joanna
    Oh, and Deena, may I copy one of your pictures on your blog? I want to post you on my blog and ask for more prayer. Let me know, okay sweetie.

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  12. Just checking in on you and being inspired by your strength and courage. Incidently, make up looks lovely on you but you don't need it.

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  13. Nancy in Northern CaliforniaJanuary 25, 2008 at 7:12 PM

    Deena,
    I consider you already an angel! I have been reading your blog for a few months and I think you are totally amazing how you always make sure you let "us" know out here what is going on with you. It just shows how thoughtful you are! I will pray for you daily!

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  14. Please feel free to use my PICS to scare mice away..My BFF Marcia's pic wont' do it..she's too
    pretty!!

    love
    ya
    Gonna fight the fight...
    deena

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  15. Deena...
    They do not know everything..
    I believe in miracles..I believe it is God who numbers our days...NOT doctors.....keep looking to Jesus...maybe reading my post today will help...and I do believe the RAPTURE could come before the day is over and Deena..I will see you in Heaven....
    Stay strong....stay real...cry laugh...we are upholding you in prayer.
    Deby

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  16. For you Deena...from me:
    http://www.geocities.com/cott1388/spafford.html

    The story is wonderful...you can do this..

    Deby

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  17. Deena,
    I've been praying for you all day. Now I know why. Yes, the news wasn't what you were hoping to hear, but you are right, trust in God He will see you through this.

    Marcia - big hugs for you. thanks for being her support.

    Rich would look cute with some blue eyeliner, I think. LOL.

    I loved the detailed account. You are so brave.I'm not giving up on you, so you can't either.

    (((((h))))))

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  18. I started to say that I wish I was better at prayers but then I looked at your smiling face again. And it seems to me that God is right there with you. May you have a peaceful night, resting in His hands.

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  19. Oh Deena,
    Please know that many are lifting you up in prayer.
    Cathy

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  20. Left you flowers over at my blog Deena. Come and get them when you are in the mood. YOU WILL SURVIVE. WE ARE ALL PULLING FOR YOU !
    *Hugs*
    Loving Annie

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  21. Oh Deen.......I am just sick. My heart goes out to you. I am so, so sorry that your cancer has advanced. I just said a prayer and will keep praying. I am so, so sorry. I know that I know that I know that behind all of this is the Lord and he has His reasons. I just want you to know that my heart is breaking for you and Rich.

    Love Sharon

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  22. Even when we do not know how to pray the Spirit knows.. and when we just cry to the Lord the Spirit turns those sobs and groanings into Spirit filled words that reach to the farthest corner of the Holy of Holies..... so just remember when you cry and just do not have the words.......... He is listening.

    Rom 8:26 Likewise the Spirit also helpeth our infirmities: for we know not what we should pray for as we ought: but the Spirit itself maketh intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered

    I will send this around on the prayer chain and I will contact a few of the on line prayer chains..........

    After having done all...................... dance............!!!!!!!!!!!!

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  23. Dear Deena,

    I found you through Loving Annie. I send you loads of healing energy and prayers. You are obviously a beautiful person with a positive, loving spirit- the type who survives!

    Many hugs,
    Betty

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  24. Good Heavens Denna, I just wanted to check and see how you made out today and your post just made me CRY.....I'm so sorry to hear about this infection and other issues that "seem" to be trying to develop....I say "seem" because I along with many others are believing that you are going to get through this trial with "flying colors"...
    Hang in there...I know it seems scary. I am so GLAD that you have such a great "support team" of friends and family all over the world that are "STANDING" with you.
    Hang in there my friend....I'll be checking back in on you.
    Be BLESSED!
    Joyce

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  25. you are in my heart deena.....and in my prayers.
    ((((hugs))))
    kimberly

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  26. Ohhh Deena~ such horrible news~ Im so very sorry. IF there is anything I can do~ just let me know. I will keep you in my prayers, as always. Be strong my friend

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  27. Prayer is real and it works, dear sweet lady. "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." We are all here with you every step of this journey you are taking and I have no doubt that the outcome will be great. When my husband had a stroke our dear friend said, "this is just a bump in the road." I'm confident that this is true in your case. Hugs and love from across the miles....

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  28. I am a friend of Joanna's, and I am sending loving healing thoughts your way!

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  29. I'm never quite sure how I end up on certain blogs but I am certain it's a "God" thing. I have been sitting here and read your whole entire blogspot. I came over from Isabella who I also don't know how I found. But, I have this bonding deal with brave women. I just am amazed how illness does make us stronger and more feeling. Why does it have to take that? But, please know that I am praying for you. I am also a "dreader" of nights so I'll remember to pray for you when I am up. Bless you!

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  30. I came from Loving Annie's to wish you well, let you know I'll keep you in my thoughts, and to say never give up the fight.

    Whatever you do, keep smiling, laughing when you can. It's right up there with faith on beating the disease.

    Hugs.

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  31. Back again to share with you a quote that helped me to put one foot after the other during my husband's treatment ...

    "There is no way out -- only a way forward." -- Michael Hollings

    Blessings.

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  32. Just dropping in from Loving Annie's to say hello.

    Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.

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  33. Deena, prayers are said for you. You are gorgeous and you can do this!

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  34. Wow. I'm visiting from Moanna's page. You will be in my prayers. What an amazingly inspirational and hopeful post. I will join you in believing in your recovery!

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  35. Hello Dear Deena, What a sweet picture of you and Hubby...My thoughts and Prayers are with you and your family. All these wonderful ladies are praying for you to get well soon.
    Know that you are Loved.
    {{Big Hug}} and many Prayers. Mary

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  36. Dearest Deena, I cried when I read your post. I couldn't believe what I was reading. Then I thought of how brave and strong you are and I KNOW you will beat this. My prayers are with you always Deena, Hugs and much love Suzanne.

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  37. Hi Deena,
    Ive just found your blog via someone, then someone else.....
    I am so glad i did :)

    You are wonderful and strong and you can kick this cancer in the butt ! My husband is a survivor and you will be too !
    YAY for you, you look fantastic and your hubby seems like a really lovely man too.

    I will be popping back for sure.

    Hugs,
    Shannon

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  38. Deena

    I just popped over from Loving Annie's blog to say hello, wish you well and pass on some love.

    I have a couple of posts on my blog you might be interested to read. One I wrote this week and one in 2005. (the 2008 one links to the earlier post)

    http://miladysa.blogspot.com/2008/01/all-clear.html

    Keep on smiling!

    Love M x

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  39. Wishing you the best in your fight dear Deena. My Mother is a two time breast cancer survivor. She was first diagnosed when I was 8 (1974) and had a mastectomy and radiation etc. and it came back again when I was 22 (1988) and she had the other breast removed etc and won again so it can be done. Believe me, the second time we were all terrified, sure it meant a death sentence. Keep positive and allow those you love to "be there" for you. Hugs.

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  40. Dena, I've rounded up my prayer warriors for you, left your picture on my blog and a message for you! I prayed all through the night that God would give you peace, strength, and an awareness of His presence with you! Today is yours --- Dance away!!!! Cora

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  41. Oh Deena ... oh my gosh, I don't know how you remain so strong because I'm LOOSING IT here just reading your post. YOU are SO STRONG ... you have so much ENDURANCE ... and you have so much faith. I'm in awe ... at the peace that radiates from your words. YOU WILL SURVIVE ... YOU WILL CONQUER ... and you will have so many praying over you.

    God bless you ... I'm so scared for you ... and yet I want to be strong to help carry you through this time.

    With much love, lots of hugs and many prayers ...

    -Dana

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  42. Deena......I just found you and will not let you go. I have been to many friends blogs today and they are all praying for you and I am on my knees to. Blog land has so many people who care about others and I am one of those people. My prayers and good wishes are with you and you can do this thing knowing you have so many who care...........

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  43. Be assured all of us love and lift you up in our prayers. Weather we know you personally or not. You are a "Child of God" and therefore important to everyone. You will be in my prayers and thoughts.

    Love,
    Jeannene
    (Love Conquers All)

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  44. You know you have my love and my prayers. And you know this is one day at a time.

    Bless you Deena.

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  45. Deena,

    I devoted my blog to you today. Please stop by. I have a picture and scripture for you.

    Bless you today. I pray that God will comfort you today. I pray you will feel a peace that surpasses understanding today. I pray you will feel all the love and warmth from your blogging friends today.

    Love Sharon

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  46. Hi Deena,

    Your courage in facing this is truly inspiring!

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  47. You are a beautiful, loving, and strong soul. Love is forever...just remember that! Stay strong when you can, and let your friends and family hold you up when you need it. You are in my prayers. ~Kris from MN

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  48. Dearest Deena, I have found you through a friend and have just finished reading your story. You are ONE SPECIAL LADY, DEENA. Your courage and faith are truly an inspiration to us all. Keep fighting the battle and please know that you have many, many, prayer warriors lifting you up right now. I want so badly to be able to give you a hug but since I can't a virtual one will have to do. Now that I have found you I will be back to see you often as we are all taking this journey right alongside you. Much love, Susan P.

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  49. found you through Moanna at Desperately Seeking Serenity.
    Sending you prayers and love.
    you are a courageous and beautiful woman.

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  50. Its so good to see you smileing!
    And look at that cute,sweet, supportive hubby you have....
    thats something to smile about! :-)

    Deena reading all these comments you must know you are not fighting this alone! We are all here with you sweetpea!
    We are all praying for you to win this battle!
    YOU CAN DO IT......

    Have a wonderful week,
    Hugz, Dolly

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  51. Deena -
    I came here from 'A Place Called Home'. I have been reading your story and I will add my prayer support to those of others. Thank you for giving us the privilege to stand with you and your family through this journey.
    ~Adrienne~

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  52. Deena;I know you will survive this your are a strong woman.I will pray for you every day .
    Brenda
    XOX

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  53. Deena, I am here through Moanna's blog -- she sent us all over with prayers, so here I am. You are surviving right now -- and you surrounded by a lot of love in all this.

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  54. Hugs.
    I don't know you but you are such an inspiration.

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  55. Hi Deena, I have been reading your story and you will be forever in my prayers. You look gorgeous with and without the makeup. You spirit is very uplifting. Stay strong in spirit and You will survive this. Hugs and prayers, Pat

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  56. Just letting you know I read about you on Sharon's blog and have read about your journey. I have you in my prayers. Your attitude is truly amazingly inspirational!
    Remember too now that cancer is now somewhat classified as a "chronic illness" meaning people live with it for years and years.And your best friend is so right when she says people have conquered every stage! Maybe this helps a little? Not sure. Living is the important word here. You certainly are doing it and giving hope and inspiration to those around you.
    Love and prayers to you and your family-

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  57. That smile is so beautiful! I'm stopping by at Annie's request to wish you many many more days of smiling. :) A prayer was lifted for you and I know that God hears all prayers. May all your days (whatever number that turns out to be) be filled with family and friends who love and support you! :)

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  58. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

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  59. Bless you my dear friend.....this is my first time visiting....I came from Mary's.....I certainly will say prayers for you.... judy

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  60. You said the words yourself sweetie - "gotta fight the fight" - and this I know you will do. Alongside you will so many of us - ordinary people like my dh and myself who have been there and are still here - thumbing our noses at cancer! We are all praying harder now as the battle intensifies.

    Lovely Deena, be strong, we are with you every step of the way.
    With love - Mary (and Bob too!).

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  61. Deena- sending you lots of hugs and prayers and good thoughts- via Joanna's blog. I'll come say hi again. Hope things are better next week.

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  62. Hi Deena. I came by way of Robin at Bittersweet Punkin. I would like to offer my prayers for you with all of these other wonderful loving women bloggers. If it is OK, I would like to add a ribbon for you on my site so that others can lift up your name as well.

    Rhonda

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  63. I read about you at Joyce's blog - The Secret Gardener. She cares about you so much and is asking prayer for you. So, I'm letting you know that I just prayed for you. It's good to know that you have God to rely on and to go to for comfort. From the amount of comments on this post, it looks like you have a lot of people who love you.

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  64. Deena, I am praying for you - you can beat this. I don't even know you and I can see what a survivor you are. What an amazing testimony you will have when you have fought and won. :) God bless you and know there people all over the country supporting you in this. :)

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  65. Hi Deena ... I'm coming from Loving Annie's and want to wish you all the best for your upcoming battle.

    Don't let the bastard win

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  66. Hi Deena,

    I came over here from Mary's site--I just wanted to let you know I am keeping you in my prayers!!

    Julieann

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  67. God Bless and keep you! I don't know you but I found your beautiful blog, "nestled in the singing woods", and have been following you since. I was so saddened to hear the news today.
    I have a poem/prayer for you that I found on a plaque at a thrift store. The plaque was decorated by a child, and it took me awhile to figure out the words. Here goes:

    Dear Father, hear and
    bless
    Thy beasts and singing
    birds
    And guard with
    tenderness
    Small things which have
    no words.


    You may already know this prayer, but I wanted to be sure to share it with you who obviously appreciates even the smallest things in nature. I am touched to know that our God, who cares for a single sparrow, also cares for you and me.

    God Bless,
    Maridon

    Maridon

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  68. Hi Deena, I was thinking about you, thinking chemo was starting soon. I'll be praying for you and your body to fight off the infection so you can get started with the chemo next week.

    You are so right, that every stage has been survived, and now that you know exactly what you're dealing with, you are better equipped to wage war on the cancer.

    My oncologist once said to me: "now we know more about how your cancer behaves"....I think I even blogged about it. I thought it funny, talking about cancer as though it were a naughty child! My cancer needed a good spanking, and that's what it got. Now yours needs a good spanking, too. I know you are ready to fight it, and although we haven't met I can tell that you are a strong enough person to beat this thing. Get better, start chemo, and keep on fighting....and blogging, because there are so many of us who care about you and want to help.

    You are, as always, in my prayers, Katie

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  69. Hello Deena,
    I found my way here via our dear friend Annie. You are a beautiful soul and my thoughts are with you. Keep on smiling and thinking positive. You have so many people that love and support you.

    Take care and live each day to the fullest.

    ~Blessings

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  70. Hi Deena, in looking at another blog, I found yours. I am praying for you. "He who began a good work in you is faithful to complete it" Phil. 1:6
    God bless you and yours.

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  71. I wish I could squeeze your hand and just give ya a big ol' hug !! God Bless you and I'll be praying for health and healing !! And special blessings going out to hubby for being there with ya !!!

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  72. Oh Deena...i am so sorry. You take your medication as prescribed and get over this infection so you can get on with your fight, ok...and take care of yourself!

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  73. Deena, here's to wishing and cheering you to beat this!

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  74. Deena, Just look at all the love and prayers coming your way! God bless (you) everyone pulling and praying for you darling!!! Yes you must fight the fight.. With your sweet hubby Rich & precious daughter Nicole by your side you can do this. Love and hugs, {{{{{{{Deena}}}}}} ~Mary~

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  75. Been praying for you---I have a friend that had been in "your boat" and She went through the treatments --although they didn't seem to be working, God was working and God healed her--this is now almost 30 years later--she is still going strong!!

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  76. Hi Deena,

    You're in my thoughts and prayers...

    Best,
    Andrea

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  77. Dearest Deena:
    I just read your Friday blog. Last night at church in included you in our prayer list. On Wed night, before service, about 500 people are praying from lists that are given out--you are on them.

    Your healing is a part of my daily devotions.

    Until next time.

    In Him,
    Jim's Patty

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  78. My Sweet Deena,
    Praying for you dear heart. Stay strong and focused and you will win this battle...I just know it. Warm Hugs to you!
    Love,
    Kimmie
    Whispering*Prims

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  79. Deena dear...I'm so sorry to hear that bad news but here's what I want to tell you and I tell everyone who has gotten bad news, this. This did not take God by surprise! He is fully aware of what's going on and you are still in the palm of his hands!! I cannot image what you are going through and how your mind must be working, but I can tell you that there's a bunch of ladies out here who love you and are standing in the gap for you during this hard season. I know heaven is being bombarded on your behalf and God is hearing every single prayer. How cool is that? The way I see it is that you are in a win win situation. You win if you stay here on earth and you win if you get to stand before God when he says to you, "Well done!" Don't be afraid..angels are around you 24-7 and then there's always the earthly and fleshy angels, called friends.
    (((( Hugs to you))))) Blessings -Erika
    p.s. you look so wonderful without make-up!!

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  80. You are in my prayers. May God's arms wrap so ever tight around you at this time and hold you as you walk through this valley & out into the sunshine and healed from God's loving touch !
    God bless you & your family !
    Eunice

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  81. Deena~~I am so sorry to hear that you have gotten more bad news. But God is bigger than any cancer!! Stand on the word of God. Jesus healed EVERYONE who came to him. Continue to stay strong and trust in Him alone!! You are in my thoughts and prayers!!

    Jackie

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  82. Sending positive energy your way.

    Blessed Be.

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  83. What a beautiful woman you are with a beautiful soul!
    You are in my prayers....

    ((((hugs))))))
    Kim

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  84. Hello Deena,
    I found you through Amy's blog tonight, and I wanted to stop by, say hello and to let you know that I will be praying for you each night. You are a strong and lovely person, and your faith and positive outlook will beat this. My husband was diagnosed Stage 3 over 5 years ago and he's doing great now. I know you will do well. Keep your chin up and know there are many people pulling for you!
    - Nancy

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  85. Deena, repeating what everyone else has said ~ God is in control ~ trust in HIM, as I know you already do. You are in my prayers always.
    Love,
    Lana

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  86. I just got goose bumps reading this post!!! Deena, I know you will beat this thing, even though it is in stage four. Story: A friend of mine had Hodgkins Disease, diagnosed stage 4 - doctors told him he would probably not live to see 20. Well, he made it!!! Yes, there are stage 4 survivors!! Be brave my friend and fight with all you have! Just remember to be good to yourself and rest, rest, rest. I tell Amy this all of the time!!!

    Love and blessings and most of prayers to you, sweet Deena!!!

    xo
    Becky

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  87. Deena,
    You are such a beautiful brave soul. I am so sorry to hear this. It is horrible and I am sad. I do know that you are a beautiful person that is strong and able to fight this. Know that I am thinking and praying for you and that you are loved. I wish I was closer to come and visit you and bring you tea and cookies. Hang in there sweetie.

    Blessings and Hugs,
    Tink

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  88. Deena,
    You are braver than I. Please know that I am praying for you. You can beat this! Fight the Fight!! We're all behind you.
    Hugs,
    Sharon

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  89. I meant to post a comment sooner and tried to but my computer was having 'posting issues'. I am keeping you in my prayers and know you will get through this!! If you need anything, you know where to find me :).

    Rach

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~**~Your kind remarks are my angel wings~**~