Up early, ready to hit the road to go for more testing. Hubby grabs his Ipod, I ask to
drive and we listen to Garrison Keeler on the way in to town.
We arrive, they tell m'e at Check In that they've already called for me..but I am not
late, they are just early. We check in, go to Imagining..I get called to put on my gown
and lock up my things.. The technician who comes to get me is the same lady who did
my mammo on Wednesday..She's kind , reminds me of her name, Denise, and says
I see you came back to us.
She does a mammo, goes to show the doctor and comes back to tell me , he wants a
sonogram..So off I go to another room. As the techician, a different lady, sets up to
do the sonogram..I think of how when I was carrying my babes, a sonogram was so
exciting and I couldn't wait to look!!
Well, I don't feel excited and I don't want to look, so I don't..when it's over..the
technician takes leave of the room to talk to the doctor and tells me she'll bring
him back and he'll talk with me. It seems so long, I finally look at the screen
..I see the pictures..and I see the SPOTS, the are dark, dense and I know what's
coming, but I keep my eyes UP..trying not to cry, praying that it will be nothing,
asking God to help me not cry..wishing my hubby was in the room, thinking why
didn't I call sooner...why is this mass in the breast they started watching in 1999,
I'm nervous scared and wishing the doctor would just come in.
The door opens, she asks are you ok??
Yes, I'm fine..
well doctor is talking to another patient..he'll be in soon..
More waiting..I look at the screen again..hard this time..there are 6 pics there
of my right breast and I can see what I know they are looking at..
The door opens, the doctor comes in..starts telling me about biopsies.and
says ..he wants to do a biopsy on the mass and a fine needle extraction on
some lymph nodes that look concerning too..
Can I do it, will I sign papers..
My husband is here .can he come in while you do the biopsy please..
"yes, we'll go get him"
Finally he is here..the technician gets me prepped..Doctor comes in..
he's kind, handsome and I love his curls at the neck.. He numbs me
up.. a long needle goes in. takes tissue out, in again..out again..tissue
on slides..one more time..
then..more numbing.. a little needle ..poke poke poke...tissue to
slides..does it two more times..all the while the technician is sonogramming
so he can see where he's going..and then she snaps pics
Tis done, I get super glued in two places..bandaged ...two lil ice packs..
and doctor says..call me tomorrow..it's Saturday, I'll be working..we may
have labs back..
I ask "what do you think" he answers " I'm very concerned these will come
I again think.. " I knew it" ...but still I look at hubby with wary eyes..and
begin to wonder..how could this all happen so fast???
We go home, lay side by side on the couch
..cute movie..I can't remember the last time we layed so close..and I relax and
and feel so loved.
Hubby gets pizza for supper , the boys go to my son's , as I am sore..
my mind races, I can't stay asleep..I get up at 3 am to pet
my lil kitty and dog..and I go back to bed and finally to sleep after 4 am.
Day four is on the horizon
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