Tuesday, November 6, 2007

Monday Nov. 5th

I heard from a friend, Dana, who I had not "talked" to for a bit. It was so
nice to hear from her. I cherish every friend I have. Later she sent
my the Pretty In Pink blinkie above.  If it's suppose to blink
it probably lost something in translation on my MACbook.
I kept busy, working with a new friend, Lennea who will
opening a new website soon. I believe it will be a most eclectic
site..here's a peak

I will have a shop of my own there for when
I am well enough to create again.  
Hubby ate dinner with ME last night. He is getting the idea
that I miss my place at the table. One would think his dad would 
encourage him to dine with me, but that is NOT the case. Some 
days I feel it's a struggle to see who can get the most attention
from Rich.  That's so wrong..I feel Rich must be torn between
the two of us..and my place should be at the top..
Four verses in the bible refer to this 
"Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife : and they
shall be one flesh" Genesis 2:24

That's not to say you LEAVE your parents  and never care for them.  I believe it also addresses the issue that parents should know that a man should make his wife
his soul mate, help mate and partner .  
I suppose as a non believer the blueprint God left us for marriage,
wouldn't mean anything. 
That is the part I struggle with, why a non believer in our home. I am sure
it is for us to work on saving his soul, but in dealing with it
I can't help but feel the presence of someone who has turned away
from God each time He has knocked on the door.  Of course I can
never know , as Rich's dad doesn't talk to me..he doesn't SPEAK to me
or acknowledge anything I do, or that I am a person , even the 
fact that I have breast cancer. 

Oh now you can see how I struggle daily with this. Some days the stress of it just washes over me .  I have prayed & prayed 
& prayed , but I must be closed to God's voice as I have heard no answer. It's been 
over 2 years & I have found no peace.  I would ask for prayers for peace & discernment,
along with the healing power I'll need.  

Two more days & I'll have the answer to the questions I have about
what kind?? what stage?? the size?? the date of surgery & what comes
after that.  I have a counselor also, so I'll be seeing her on
Friday..perfect timing..I'll need some help sorting out my fears.

I finally spoke with my youngest daughter about my cancer.  She is not 
going to be easy to talk to about it. I know she has a hard time 
being open with me, but I will continue to encourage her to
know I am open to anything she would ever want to discuss.
As a youngster , she was very open.  She told me once "Mom, I'll never
leave you...we'll be angels in Heaven together"   ..as I write those words
I am crying..as that is the most wonderful thought..and I pray it's 
true that someday we will ALL be angels in Heaven.  Till then
I want to be an "angel" here on Earth.  So pray with me
that we show God's love here on Earth to each we meet or 
cross paths with.

one last thing***
I opened up my Pink Scrap Book & have added some cards and thoughts 
and hope to make it a celebration of healing by God's hand.
thanks to all of you for continuing to help me down this road of life.
fondly, deena


  1. Oh, Deena, my heart goes out to you. For the obvious reason, my prayers go out for you to cope, heal and recover, but also for the situation with your father-in-law. I can feel your pain as you talk about the situation. Does your husband know about your pain? Men don't just pick up on emotional things, they have to be told point-blank. That's just the nature of the beast. I pray for relief from that situation.

  2. I love you Deena!

  3. you are in my prayers daily, sissy...hugs to ya...

  4. The Creative Call Site is very pretty! Good to work on the future and keep eyes ahead and the creative going and flowing.
    Long day today....for some reason I am missing some things long gone.
    So I let myself just let the tears flow. I started laughing cause I was flipping channels and on came earlier today's Oprah, I don''t watch Oprah....but they were playing a favorite song, "I had the time of my life..." and this couple who had been on YouTube was dancing and OUT CAME PATRICK SWAYZE!! And he took the guys wife and danced with her!!! I tell you, I know most think I am sooooo, well, not conservative...but I really really liked that movie and it was great to see him dance again! How the heck does he stay looking so thin and slim! Dancers, guess like Jayne Seymore, they never get old.


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